Post by Johnathan on Aug 31, 2012 17:30:16 GMT -5
Hello, good morning, and welcome to The Academy of Forgotten Arts! For many of you this is a momentous day in your lives, signifying the start of your higher learning. For many others, it could be the beginning of the end of your lives.
*Speaking to another teacher on stage*
What? I shouldn't say things like that? Well of course I was joking, they all know that! Figures show that the academy's survival ratings have drastically in- Ow! You hit me with your shoe! No, I'm not giving it back now. My speech? Oh right, right, I'm giving a speech aren't I? Ahem.
*Let it be known now, that while Headmaster Eleazar may be a master of all known forms of the magical arts, he has been growing increasingly senile over the years.*
Well what sort of commencement speech would this be without a section on history that everyone knows? That's right, a bad one, so here's the history you all should know! (Your are enrolling in my elite academy after all.)
One thousand years ago, the greatest magi of the era discovered an existential plane beyond that of their own. Using their combined power and wisdom, they crafted the first of the Divinity Gates, linking the dimensional planes and forming the foundation of society that stands resolute to this day.
Over the course of history, more gates were opened, linking to additional existences, each with its own unique peoples and culture. Many of these nations could not see eye to eye with one another, and the first of the Ascension Wars erupted.
Five hundred years ago, those vicious and bloody wars finally came to an end, with the signing of the Divine Pact. In the aftermath of those turbulent times, a plan was put in motion to help unify the previously warring nations. It was a plan meant to bridge the culture gaps, promote the mingling of ideas and viewpoints, and to facilitate the teaching of the Divinity Pact Nations' knowledge and arts.
One hundred years later, the construction of this great academy was completed. Today, all of you will begin writing your own stories, into the legacy of this great academy. It's up to you whether that story turns into a triumphant epic, or a heart wrenching tragedy.
Well, since that part is now out of the way, let me move on to some words of caution. As most of you know, the dimension this academy resides in is an enigma. When our ancestors first arrived, they found nothing but the ruins of a long since extinct civilization. It wasn't until they dug deeper and traveled farther, that they discovered the decay.
Beyond the walls of the academy city are many small villages and farms. Students are free to visit these locations as they please during their breaks and free time. However, beyond the Dark Wall that protects these villages, no student may travel alone. There are many enigmatic creatures and ruins in the depths of the unknown. They lurk their, waiting for the curious, adventurous, and foolish to stumble in alone. It brings me no joy to admit, but the protection the Academy and the Dark Wall offer mean nothing in the Decayed Expanse. No student is to travel beyond the Dark Wall without a full team and a Guardian. Your parents did not send you into my care so that I could let you throw your lives away and I will make no concessions to this rule.
Well, beyond that, respect your teachers and fellow classmates, follow the instructions your mentors provide, um brush your teeth every morning an evening. Oh dear, I'm running out of things to say. Remember to change your underwear ever day!
What's that Alvion? What do you mean it's time for my nap? I can make my way off the stage myself thank you very much. I'll have you know that the students love me. They always have and they always will.
Ah! Wait. Wait! Put me down this instant! I'm the headmaster, you can't do this! Kids help me! This evil evil man plans to do away with me! No I'm not finished with my speech yet!
If anyone sees a dragon in the city contact me immediately! Agatha went missing weeks ago and I haven't seen her since! She's extremely violent and murderous and it worries me that I can't find her!
*The Master is carried kicking and screaming off the stage*
*Speaking to another teacher on stage*
What? I shouldn't say things like that? Well of course I was joking, they all know that! Figures show that the academy's survival ratings have drastically in- Ow! You hit me with your shoe! No, I'm not giving it back now. My speech? Oh right, right, I'm giving a speech aren't I? Ahem.
*Let it be known now, that while Headmaster Eleazar may be a master of all known forms of the magical arts, he has been growing increasingly senile over the years.*
Well what sort of commencement speech would this be without a section on history that everyone knows? That's right, a bad one, so here's the history you all should know! (Your are enrolling in my elite academy after all.)
One thousand years ago, the greatest magi of the era discovered an existential plane beyond that of their own. Using their combined power and wisdom, they crafted the first of the Divinity Gates, linking the dimensional planes and forming the foundation of society that stands resolute to this day.
Over the course of history, more gates were opened, linking to additional existences, each with its own unique peoples and culture. Many of these nations could not see eye to eye with one another, and the first of the Ascension Wars erupted.
Five hundred years ago, those vicious and bloody wars finally came to an end, with the signing of the Divine Pact. In the aftermath of those turbulent times, a plan was put in motion to help unify the previously warring nations. It was a plan meant to bridge the culture gaps, promote the mingling of ideas and viewpoints, and to facilitate the teaching of the Divinity Pact Nations' knowledge and arts.
One hundred years later, the construction of this great academy was completed. Today, all of you will begin writing your own stories, into the legacy of this great academy. It's up to you whether that story turns into a triumphant epic, or a heart wrenching tragedy.
Well, since that part is now out of the way, let me move on to some words of caution. As most of you know, the dimension this academy resides in is an enigma. When our ancestors first arrived, they found nothing but the ruins of a long since extinct civilization. It wasn't until they dug deeper and traveled farther, that they discovered the decay.
Beyond the walls of the academy city are many small villages and farms. Students are free to visit these locations as they please during their breaks and free time. However, beyond the Dark Wall that protects these villages, no student may travel alone. There are many enigmatic creatures and ruins in the depths of the unknown. They lurk their, waiting for the curious, adventurous, and foolish to stumble in alone. It brings me no joy to admit, but the protection the Academy and the Dark Wall offer mean nothing in the Decayed Expanse. No student is to travel beyond the Dark Wall without a full team and a Guardian. Your parents did not send you into my care so that I could let you throw your lives away and I will make no concessions to this rule.
Well, beyond that, respect your teachers and fellow classmates, follow the instructions your mentors provide, um brush your teeth every morning an evening. Oh dear, I'm running out of things to say. Remember to change your underwear ever day!
What's that Alvion? What do you mean it's time for my nap? I can make my way off the stage myself thank you very much. I'll have you know that the students love me. They always have and they always will.
Ah! Wait. Wait! Put me down this instant! I'm the headmaster, you can't do this! Kids help me! This evil evil man plans to do away with me! No I'm not finished with my speech yet!
If anyone sees a dragon in the city contact me immediately! Agatha went missing weeks ago and I haven't seen her since! She's extremely violent and murderous and it worries me that I can't find her!
*The Master is carried kicking and screaming off the stage*